Reality Fic
by EraseAlpha
Summary: A parody of reality T.V. featuring OP characters.Extremely crack and idiotic.Don't say I didn't warn.
1. Intro

Hi! Well, let me explain this.

It's 1:30 A. M. and I'm high on sugar.

So I decided to make a fanfic about the Straw Hats in a reality T. V. Show.

This is total crack and it's supposed to be crazy and rule breaking. So don't complain.

:

A tall, blond, green-eyed teen aged girl is sitting at a desk, inside a T. V. Studio.

? ? ? :"Yo! I'm Diana (DEE-ana) Fernandes Mourão. But you can just call me Erase. Or Diana. I really don't give a shit. Anyway, welcome to Reality Fic. The T. V. show that takes 20 characters from One Piece, sticks them in a mansion together and tortures them. Each chapter is a day, and every seven days, three of them get a penalty. At the first penalty they get a warning. At second, a week in Detention. At third. . . They're off the game. There are two special rooms in the house. The Room and Detention. The Room is a confessional. They will expose their darkest secrets to you, the reader. In Detention, punishment happens. They can go to Detention by penalties or faults. Faults are when they brake the rules. The rest will be explained as the game proceeds. Now let us meet the contestants. 10 male, 10 female. "

She snaps her fingers and 20 arm chairs appear on the room.

Erase:"First, the boys. He's 17, owns his own ship, and is a captain! Give a warm welcome to. . . Luffy! "

Luffy walks into the room and sits on a chair.

Luffy:"Hi! "

Erase:"Hi Luffy. The next boy is a 19 year old that works as a First-Mate. He's really good with swords and his name is Zoro! "

Zoro walks in and also sits on a chair.

Erase:"Aw, you look so cute with those little butter knifes. "

Zoro:"Shut yer trap before I cut your head off. "

Erase:"Yeah, whatever. The next boy is, in my opinion, the hottest, cutest, handsomest cook ever, he's 19 and a great kicker. Heeeellllloooo, Sanji! ! "

Sanji:"Hello. "

Erase:"You can't kick a girl, right? "

Sanji:"That's right. "

Erase:"Goody! That means that I can abuse you all I want, and I won't get my ass kicked! "

Sanji:"Huh? "

Erase:"The next dude is a cowardly sharpshooter and he's 17! Say hello to Usopp! "

Usopp:"I'm not cowardly! "

Erase:"Pff, yeah right! Next! 15, doctor, cute! Heeeeeeeee's Chopper! "

Chopper(Doing his little squiggly dance. )"I won't get happy, even if you call me cute and doctor. "

Erase:"Yeah, whatever ya say. He's a 34 year old shipwright. Franky! "

Franky:"SUUUUUPPPPPPAAAAHHHH! "

Erase:"Err. . . O. . . Kay. . . Anyway, the next guy is a. . . 86 year old skeleton musician? Geez, Where did we get these guys? "

Brook:"Hi. "

A brown haired teen, with a head piece appears.

Chase:"In a shonen anime. "

Erase:"Chase, that was a rhetorical question. "

Chase:"Whatever. "

He quickly left.

Erase:"Next one! He's 20, he's literally hot and he's a Commander! Ace! "

Ace:"Hi there! "

Erase:"Hi. This one is smoking! Literally! Smoker! And I think he must be forty or something. "

Smoker:"Hmph. "

Erase:"Last boy! He has a square nose! Kaku! "

Kaku:"Hey, how's it going? "

Erase:"Great, thank you. How 'bout ya? "

Kaku:"Same old, same old. "

Erase:"Anyway, that's the last boy. Now for the girls! She's 18, a navigator and a thief. Nami! "

Nami:"Isn't self-insertion a fanfiction taboo? "

Erase:"Read the author's notes, baby. Next, 28, archaeologist. Robin! "

Robin walked in, waved to the readers and sat on a chair.

Erase:"The next one is a secret agent but she has experience as a secretary! Kalifa! "

Kalifa:"Good afternoon. "

Erase:"Good afternoon. The next one is a marine with a horrible fashion sense! Tashigi! "

Tashigi:"I don't have a horrible fashion sense! "

Nami:"Yes, you do. "

Erase:"Exactly, Nami. Thanks for supporting me. The next girl is also a marine, she's about Smoker's age and she refers to herself in the third person. Say hello to Hina. "

Hina:"Hina is very happy to be here. "

Erase:"Uh, yeah, whatever. . . The next one used to be fat! I don't know what diet she used but I want it too! "

Nami:"Yeah, you need it. "

Erase:"If you don't shut up, you'll start the show in detention! Anyway, here's Alvida! "

Alvida:"It's a Demon Fruit. "

Erase:"Cool. Anyway, the next girl is from Usopp's village and she's studding to be a doctor! Kaya! "

Kaya:"Hello, good afternoon! "

Erase:"Hello. The next girl is 16 and a princess! Vivi! "

Vivi:"Hi! "

Erase:"Hi. And the next girl is. . . Is. . . Chase, why isn't anything written on the cards? "

He walked over to her and whispered something.

Erase:"What do you mean by "There isn't anyone else. "? ! Not one? "

Chase:"The rest weren't viable candidates. "

Erase:"Viable? Viable! It's a damn reality show! I didn't even know we had standards! "

Chase:"Well, we do. "

Erase:"What are we going to do, now? "

Chase:"Maybe we could call someone? "

Erase:"Err. . . Oh, I know! Characters from my comics! Yeah, that'll do! Can we have a break please? "

_Commercial break:_

_-_

_Devil Fruit! Devil Fruit! Devil Fruit! _

_Eat a Devil Fruit and you'll gain super, awesome powers! _

_Eat it! Eat it! Eat it! _

_Devil Fruit Inc. isn't responsible for side effects such as becoming a hammer. _

_-_

_Zany Electronics is proud. Proud for serving your electronic needs for 20 years! _

_And I'm here to announce our new electronic wonder! _

_Our awesome 20 inch plasma! _

_Only for. . . 300SC! _

_Get it in our stores and in any electronic store! _

_Zany. Bringing you electronics. _

_-_

_The newest Ruby model is here! _

_The Ruby 360 sneakers are here and they're better than the rest! _

_With new technology and a new design! _

_(A guy wearing the shoes runs around the world, stops suddenly and makes a 360º spin and just keeps running)_

_Ruby. For you. _

_-_

_End of commercial break. _

Erase:"Okay, we're back! Now, the next girl is 18 and a character in my comics! She's studding to be a lawyer in some of the comics and fighting evil in the others! She's Jamie! "

A girl with dark blond, long hair, green eyes, spiky bangs and punk clothing walks in.

Jamie:"Yo! Wazzup! "

Erase:"Wazzup! The next girl is 20 and another character in my comics! She's also studding but to be a biologist! Her name is Amber! "

Another girl, with short, brown hair, amber colored eyes and wearing glasses and simple clothes walks in.

Amber:"Hum, hello. "

Erase:"Hello. With this we end the introduction! Now let the game begin! If you don't mind you will go outside now. "

The group did has they were told. Outside was 20 black Opel Astras with painted windows in the back doors and 20 men in black suits. The men escorted each one to a different car and drove off.

Back in the studio, Erase turned to the cameras.

Erase:"Now, there are lots of shit we didn't tell. "

She took a black envelope out of her pocket.

Erase:"This is one of them. The drivers were instructed to give them a envelope just like this. In the inside there is a message. And this is it:

"Dear player

If you are reading this, then you are near the house. There are things we didn't tell you and one of them is that you are going to have partners. You and your partner will have to do tasks. Together. And you cannot choose your partner. We already chose him/her for you.

Thank you for participating and good luck.

Erase

Turn this over for the name of your partner. "

Now, they must be near the house. And there are hidden cameras in the cars. Let's take a look. And see what they think of the partnerships. "

_

Nami is reading the letter calmly. She turns it around.

"Sonofabitch! Sanji? "

_

Sanji is reading with an eyebrow raised. He turns it around and goes heart-eyed.

"NAMI-SSSWWWAAANNN! "

_

Robin turns it around.

"Ah. Luffy. "

_

Luffy turns it around and grins.

"Yay, Robin! "

_

Kalifa turns it around and raised an eyebrow.

"Kaku. Interesting. "

_

Kaku turns it around and smiles.

"Oh, good! Kalifa. "

_

Hina turns it around and frowns.

"Hina is not happy. "

_

Smoker turns it around and groans.

"Dammit. I got Hina. "

_

Kaya turns it around and smiles.

"Great, I got Usopp! "

_

Usopp turns it around and grins.

"Alright! Kaya! "

_

Alvida turns it around.

"Who's Franky? "

_

Franky turns it around and raised a eyebrow.

"Huh? "

_

Vivi turns it around and smiles.

"I got Chopper-kun. "

_

Chopper turns it around and also smiles.

"Phew, I thought I was going to be with someone scary. "

_

Amber turns it around and starts shivering.

"The. . . The. . . The skeleton! "

_

Brook turns it around.

"Yohoho! I am so lucky to be with such a beautiful lady! "

_

Jamie turns it around and smirks.

"That Ace guy, huh? Hehehe. . . "

_

Ace turns it around.

"Jamie? The hot punk chick? "

_

Tashigi turns it around and her jaw drops.

"Him? "

_

Zoro turns it around and his jaw also drops.

"Her? "

_

All the cars stop in front of a huge mansion. Everyone comes out and gather around a fountain. A jeep appears and Erase jumps off it.

Erase:"Yo! Is everyone happy? "

Nami:"I'm. Going. To. Kill. You. "

Erase:"I'll take that as a "no". Anyway, I'm here to explain some more stuff. Each day there will be a task. The winner couple gets a prize. Now let's talk 'bout money. "

Nami grinned widely.

Nami:"Money? "

Erase:"Yes, money. Our currency around this parts is Scales(SC). You earn money by doing various stuff. Once a week, a taxi will come here, to take players that want to go shopping. But only 7 can go. And now the house. In the left side is the girls bedroom an the girls bathroom. Guys can't go in there. Also, in the left, is the lounge and the storage room. In the right side there is the guys bedroom and bathroom. No girls. Also, kitchen and dinning room. In the middle there is Detention, The Room, three private rooms and another bathroom without restrictions. "

Nami:"What's the private rooms for? "

Erase:"Guess. "

Nami:"Huh? Oh. Oh! Wait, who do you expect to. . . You know. "

Erase:"What? Have sex? Sleep together? Fuck each other? Forn-"

Nami:"Yes, that! "

She shrugged.

Erase:"Dunno. Anyway, it's getting late. Now I want you to go inside and take turns at The Room. Then you can whatever the hell you want. "

Everyone nodded and went inside.

_Confessions:_

Nami:

This is going to be awful. I know it. I can't do it. I can't work with Sanji! He's annoying! Yeah, some people think he's sweet, but I know he just wants to get in my pants.

Tashigi:

Oh. My. Gawd! Nami is such a bitch! Was that commentary about my clothes really necessary? I get the announcer, it's her job to be mean! But Nami? It feels like I already have an enemy and the game hasn't really started yet. And worse, I'm stuck with that green-haired idiot! This couldn't get worse!

Zoro:

This isn't good. Look, I can't stay with Tashigi. She reminds me too much of someone I lost. Please, I can't.

Franky:

I have no idea who that Alvida chick is!

Sanji:

Yeah, I'm happy. VERY happy. It's like a dream come true. But I'm kinda worried about that "abuse" comment earlier. I'm afraid of what she'll do to me.

Alvida:

I don't know why I'm doing this. My life feels so empty so I thought joining would fill that but. . . I don't know.

Hina:

Hina is very annoyed. Very annoyed.

Smoker:

I'm going to die. Wait, maybe I already died. And went to hell.

Jamie:

This is going to be interesting. I just know it. .

Amber:

I don't want to stay with that skeleton. He's scary.

Brook:

Yohoho! The house is full of girls!

Ace:

Meh. I don't really have anything to say.

Luffy:

I hope there's lots of meat!

Robin:

I find this interesting. It'll be a different experience.

Vivi:

Squee! Choppy is so cute! I'm glad I got him.

Chopper:

I'm glad I'm with Vivi. All the other girls, except Robin, are scary. Especially Nami.

Usopp:

Yay! Kaya!

Kaya:

This is going to be fun!

Kaku:

I'm glad to be with Kalifa. It's better than to be with some stranger.

Kalifa:

Kill me now.

_End of confessions. _

__

So? How bad was it?


	2. Day 1

New chapie!Now things are starting to get good!

:

DAY 1

_Front Garden,8:17 A.M._

Erase:"Did everyone sleep well?"

Nami:"No,since the damn alarm lock started ringing at 6!"

Erase:"You're a whine away from Detention,young lady!"

Nami:"I'm older than than you."

Erase:"Oh yeah?Well,I'm taller."

Nami:"What?We're the same height!"

Erase:"You're wearing heels and I'm wearing flat Converse sneakers."

Nami:"...Bitch."

Erase:"Yes,yes I am. Now it's time for the task announcement!But first...Today's special guest!"

Sanji:"Special guest?"

Erase:"Aw,did I forget to tell you about that?Each day,there will be a different special guest!And todays guest is...Axel Michaels,from my comics.

Another black Astra appears. A guy with short,spiky blond hair and blue eyes steps out.(A/N:By the way,if you want pictures of them,check my DeviantArt(Link on profile.) cuz I might have some.)

Axel:"Hey!"

Everyone mutters greetings and turn towards Erase.

Luffy:"So what's the task?"

Erase:"The task is...(dramatic pose)...to dance the tango with your pairs!"

Everyone:"..."

Nami:"OH,YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDING ME!"

Erase:"Sorry,I'm not."

Nami:"I'm not going to dance with Sanji!"

Erase:"Did I mention that the couple who dances best will get 500SC?"

Nami:"I'm going to dance with Sanji."

Erase:"Great. Now,the contest will start at 3:00 P.M..'Till then,you can do whatever ya want."

_

* * *

_

Confessions:

Amber:

AAARGGHH!I DON'T WANT TO DANCE WITH A SKELETON!

Hina:

Hina is getting even more unhappy.

Sanji:

(Hoping around the room.)

Yes,yes,yes,yes,yes,yes,yes,yes,yes,yes,yes,yes,yes,yes-

Smoker:

No fucking way.

Zoro:

Yelp.

_End of confessions._

* * *

_Kitchen,12:43 P.M._

Nami and Zoro and sitting at the kitchen table eating lunch,Sanji is cooking.

Zoro(Eating the food extremely fast):"This tastes like crap."

Sanji:"What did you say,Marimo?"

Zoro:"I said this tastes like crap. Why,are you deaf,Ero-cook?"

The swordsman stood up and glared at the chef. They suddenly started fighting.

Sanji:"Bastard!"

Zoro:"Pervert!"

Jaime entered the kitchen.

Jamie:"What the fuck is going on?"

Nami:"Eh. Don't worry. This is normal. They do it all the time."

Jamie:"Well,they better stop!It's pissing me off."

Nami:"Oh,trust me. They won't stop because you say so. In fact they won't stop for anything."

Jamie:"Oh really?"

She walked over to the pair,grabbed their necks and slammed them against the table.

Jamie:"Listen up. Either you two remain silent for as long as I'm here,or...I'll make your life HELL. Get it?"

Sanji:"Yes Jamie-chan."

Zoro:"No way I'm obeying some girl!"

CRACK!

Jamie:"Get. It?"

Zoro:"Yes,yes!"

She turned around and saw a bug-eyed Nami.

Jamie:"What?"

Nami:"You...Zoro...How the hell did you do that?"

Jamie:"Hey,I guess I'm just crazy strong."

She left whistling.

_

* * *

_

Confessions:

Nami:

Okay,this is starting to scare me.

_End of confessions_

* * *

_Front garden,3:01 P.M._

Erase:"I hope everyone ate well,cuz you're gonna need the energy."

Axel:"Now,for this task,you're going to dance the tango. I have instruction books here. One for each couple. Here."

He started throwing the manuals.

Axel:"I'm going to explain the rules. Everyone will dance simultaneous and when a couple makes a mistake,they will have to stop dancing. Got it?"

Everyone nodded.

Axel:"Very well. You'll have 20 minutes to read the books and then we'll start!"

_

* * *

_

Louge,3:24 P.M.

Erase:"Okay,did everyone read it all?Good. Now as you can see,the show crew pushed all the furniture against the walls. This leaves us enough room for the task. Now Axel,can you do the honors?"

Axel:"Sure!"

He pushed the play button on a nearby stereo. Tango music started.

Axel:"Start dancing!"

Everyone paired up. Nami glared at Sanji.

Nami:"If your hand comes anywhere near my ass or chest,you will enter a world of pain.

Sanji:"Y-yes Nami-san."

Chopper changed into Heavy Point.

Axel:"In three..."

Erase:"Two...

Axel:"One..."

Erase & Axel:"ZERO!DANCE!"

Everyone started dancing.

Erase:"Hina,Smokey!Ya out!Fighting in the middle of the tango is not allowed."

Axel:"Zoro,Tashigi!Out!You can't threat your partner with a sword!"

Tashigi:"Not even a little?"

Axel:"No."

SLAM!

Kaku:"YAARGH!"

Erase:"Out!Kalifa you can't kick your partner in the nuts."

Axel:"Vivi,Chopper!Out!This is tango not ice skating. You can't lift your partner in the air."

Chopper:"Sorry."

CRASH!

Erase:"Jamie,did you just throw Ace out the window?"

Jamie:"Maybe."

Erase:"Out."

Axel:"Luffy,you're not allowed to stretch!Out!"

Amber:"I give up!I can't keep this anymore!"

Erase:"Fine,you're out."

It came down to three couples. Sanji and Nami,Usopp and Kaya,Franky and Alvida.

Erase:"Franky,Alvida!Things are kinda sloppy there."

Franky:"I can't grab her!She's slippery!"

Erase:"Out!"

Franky(whispering):"...Bitch."

Erase:"HEY!I heard that!"

Only two now.

Erase:"..."

Axel:"..."

Erase:"I don't think any of them will make any mistakes."

Axel:"Yeah."

Erase:"Listen up!Form now on,you have 50 seconds to impress us!Go!"

Sanji looked down at Nami.

Sanji:"You want to win,right?"

Nami:"Uh,yeah..."

Sanji:"Great.

Axel and Erase's jaws dropped as they saw the most amazing tango ever. Even Usopp and Kaya stopped.

Erase:"I-I guess we have a winner..."

Axel:"Uh-uh."

Nami looked at the cook.

Nami:"That...That was amazing..."

Sanji:"Thanks."

Axel walked over to them.

Axel:"Here are the 500SC.Congrats."

Erase:"You're the winners. Wow."

_

* * *

_

Kitchen,4:54 P.M.

Nami is eating a sandwich,Tashigi walks in.

Tashigi:"Oh. You're here...So I guess you're feeling pretty good now."  
Nami:"Uh?"

Tashigi:"Yeah,you and that cook won the task and the money. Because you're so perfect. Yes,you are a perfect person with a perfect fashion sense. Hmph."

She turned around and left. The navigator just shrugged and kept eating. Then Sanji came in.

Sanji:"Hey. How's your sandwich?"  
Nami:"Fine."

Sanji:"So..."

Nami:"No."

Sanji:"I didn't say anything yet!"

Nami:"I don't love you and I don't want to go out with you."

Sanji:"Oh...Okay..."

He left. Nami shrugged again and kept eating her sandwich. Jamie came in.

Jaime:"Hey,wh-"

Nami:"Oh,what now?"  
Jamie:"Uh?"

Nami:"Can't you just leave me alone?"

Jamie:"Ooooo...kay..."

_

* * *

_

Confessions:

Tashigi:

Ugh,she thinks she's so good.(Whispering)Lousy,good-for-nothing bitch.

Sanji:

Why?Why won't she love me.(Starts crying)Whyyyyyyy?

Jamie:

Yeah,I think she has some problems.

_End of confessions._

* * *

_Louge,5:12 P.M._

Robin and Kalifa are sitting on the couch,watching T.V.

Robin:"This is boring."

Kalifa:"Yeah."

Robin:"..."

Kalifa:"..."

Robin:"Wanna make out?"

Kalifa:"Sure."

So they start making out.And Nami walks in.

Nami:"What the...Oh my gawd!"

She backs away and slams the door behind her.

_

* * *

_

Main hall,5:16 P.M.

The navigator leans against the door,panting.Jamie walks over to her.

Jamie:"What's wrong?"

Nami:"They...Oh my...Shit!...Don't go in there!"

Jamie:"...Why?"

Nami:"Just don't!"

_

* * *

_

Confenssions:

Jamie:

Okay,I'm begening to fear for Nami's mental sanity.I think she's shcizofrenic...It's illegal to let someone with mental problems enter a reality T.V. show.Maybe I could sue the company.That would do great on my resume.Now,I just have to proof it...

_End of confessions_

* * *

_Dining room,8:23_

Everyone is eating dinner.Jamie is looking at Nami,Kalifa and Robin are smiling at eachother and Nami is looking at them.Everything is silent.

Sanji:"So,how's dinner?"

Zoro:"You should know.You're the one who made it."

Sanji:"That's why I need to ask,bastard!"  
Zoro:"Pervert cook!"

Jamie:"What did I tell you about fighting?"

Sanji:"Sorry,Jamie-chan."

Zoro:"Hmph"

She looked back at Nami,who was still looking at the other two.

Jamie:"Is something wrong bothering you?"

Nami:"Uh,well..."

Jamie:"The weather,the show,halucinations?"

Nami:"What was that last one?"

Jamie:"The show?"

Nami:"I could swear I...Nevermind.No,I'm okay."

Jamie:"Oh.Really?Good for you."

_

* * *

_

Confessions:

Nami:

Alright,this show is getting strange.I don't know if I can stay here.Maybe I should give up?But then,I really want the prize money.Eh,I can take strange.

Ace:

Yeah,that window was hard.It hurt.A lot.

Kaku:

Kalifa has one hell of a kick.

Usopp:

Yeah,I'm kinda sad we didn't win.Oh well.

_End of confessions._

* * *

_In The Studio_:

Erase:"Hello!Now iit's time for...Axel,could you?"

Axel:"Sure!Do you see that little blue button?Click on it and vote for the two people you want out of the house!One girl and one boy.If you don't vote,she can't write the next chapter!So vote!It'll only take a minute or two."

Erase:"Well said buddy.Now do as he says!Or else!"

:

Yeah,short chapter.


	3. Day 2

I'm baaaaaaaaaaack. Sorry for not updating for so long but I had to think about a few things. In order to not end up with a 150+ chapter fic, I decided to change the rules. Somebody gets off every 3 chapters. No mercy. Now, on to the chapie!  
:

DAY 2

_Front Garden,5:00 A.M._

Nami:"What the hell did you do to your hair?"

Erase, now with shoulder length hair, shorter at the back and with a way lighter shade of blond on her bangs and locks of hair near to her face, grinned.

Erase:"Like it?"

Nami:"You are an affront to good taste."

Erase:"Thanks. Well then, gooooooood morning, kiddies(even though you're all older than me (Well technically me and Chopper are the same age))!"

Zoro:"Why. The. Fuck. Did. You. Wake. Us. Up. At. 5. Fucking. A.M.?"

Erase:"Not a morning person, uh? Well, sucks for you. The next challenge is to do some exercise!"

Nami:"Just that?"  
Erase:"Of course not! It's a really stupid kind of exercise! But, before I start torturing you, it's time to announce our guest for today! And he is...Cool Guy!"

A black Astra appeared. A Puerto-Rican guy comes out.

CG:"Hi! Nice torturing ya!"  
Nami:"God help me."

Erase:"Now, here's the task for today! First,you're going to swim in a river! A river infested with crocodiles!"  
Vivi:"*Yelp*"

CG:"Then, after you finish that, you're going to lift some weights. Made of hamburgers!"  
Sanji:"That's just stupid."  
Erase: "Afterwards, you're going wrestling! With bears!"  
Usopp:"Meep."

CG: "After that, you're going to run some laps! While being chased by rabid squirrels!"

Luffy:"OOH, RABID SQUIRRELS!"  
Erase:"And that's the task for the next few episodes! You will start today at 5 P.M.! See ya then!"  
Erase and Cool Guy got into the car and drove off.

_Kitchen,12 P.M._

Everyone was having lunch. Jamie was staring at Nami.

Nami:"Oh, for God's sake, what?"  
Jamie:"Oh,nothing. Nothing at all..."  
Jamie stretched over the table, so her face was inches near Nami's.

Nami:"You're making me very uncomfortable."  
Jamie:"Oh, sorry."  
She sat back on her chair, smiling at Nami.

_Confessions:_

Nami:

That girl is seriously creeping me out. Honestly, I think I'm going to have a mental breakdown if I stay in this show much longer. Things are just weird.

Jamie:

I swear, I swear I'm getting closer to prove Ginger's psycho!

_Front Garden,5:12 P.M._

Erase:"Hey, you're all late!"  
Nami:"Fuck you."  
Erase:"I guess you're not that big on exercise, uh?"

Nami:"Apparently neither are you, fatass!"  
Erase:"HEY! I am NOT fat. Plus I do like exercise, I like to run and baseball and basketball and skating and-"  
Nami:"Okay, just move on!"

Erase:"Eh, sorry. Cool Guy, will you do the honors?"

CG:"Release the crocodiles!"  
In the river you didn't know was there but was there all the time, I swear, a bunch of crocodiles appeared.

Erase:"Okay, in the first round, you're all going going to swim. The water isn't actually water but a special totally safe chemical compost so even Akuma no Mi users can swim. Don't worry nobody will die even if they are caught by a crocodile."  
Sanji:"How?"

Erase:"This show is PG-13, violent deaths are not allowed."  
"Sanji:"..."  
CG:"Watch out pairings. Both elements must reach the end!"

Erase:"Everyone who survives, err, reaches the end passes to the next round. Could you please change into your bathing suits?"  
Everyone took their clothes off (The bathing suits were underneath you perverts).

Erase:"What, EVERYONE has bathing suits? Not one of you is going to swim naked?"  
CG:"Pervert."  
Erase:"Say's the guy who spends half his life reading hentai."  
CG:"Shaddup. Okay, let's begin the countdown. 3!"

Erase:"2!"

CG:"1!"

Erase & CG:"JUMP!"

Everyone jumped into the water and started swimming. As soon as Vivi started picking up speed a huge crocodile appeared. Chopper changed into Heavy point and sent the crocodile flying.  
Vivi:"Thank you, Chopper-kun!"  
Chopper:"It's okay but we are behind now."

Sanji and Nami were on the lead but three of the biggest crocodiles started going after them. Nami tried to dodge and continue but the crocodiles blocked her path.

Nami:"What the...Is it me or these crocodiles smarter than usual?"

Sanji:"It's seems so. It appears we need to fight our way through."  
Sanji kicked a crocodile and it flew away.

As the two of them were fighting the crocodiles Jamie and Ace were on the lead.

Jamie:"Think you can keep up with me,lil'boy?"

Ace:"Eh, we'll see who can keep up with who!"

A crocodile approached them. Jamie looked at it and growled. The crocodile turned around and left them alone.

Ace:"...Wow."  
Jamie:"I'll take that as a compliment."

???:"AARGH!"  
???:"GET THAT SUPID THING OFF ME!"  
Erase:"Oh, CG, check it out!"

CG:"Who would've known that a crocodile could swallow Alvida whole and and still catch Franky's leg?"  
Erase:"Hey, look at Brook!"  
Brook was grabbing Amber's wrist and running across the water."  
Amber:"Brook, you're AMAZING!"  
Brook:"YOHOHO!"

And suddenly a crocodile appeared and swalowed'em whole.

Erase:"...Ouch..."  
CG:"...Indeed..."

Erase:"So, Franky, Alvida, Brook and Amber are out of the game and Jamie and Ace are at the lead."  
CG:"Actually, Jamie and Ace already won."

The blond looked at the finish line and there was the pair, drinking cherry slushies.

Jamie waved at her and she waved back.

Erase:"Damn, my characters are awesome."  
CG:"Yeah, too bad you're not!"

She was going to punch him but stopped.  
Erase:"Sanji and Nami finished. Where are the crocodiles they were fighting?"  
CG:"Somewhere in China,if you go by the strength of Sanji's kick."

Erase:"Kalifa and Robin are there too. Where are their guys?"

At nearly the beginning of the river was Kaku, with Usopp on his back, who in turn had Kaya on his back. Poor Kaku was desperately trying to swim.  
And Luffy...

Luffy:"GOMU GOMU NO GATLING GUN."

Erase:"And there goes three perfectly good crocodiles."  
CG:"What a waste."  
Erase:"Hey, Cool, get those crocodiles on shore, please."  
CG:"WHAT, WHY?"  
Erase:"I want a new wallet."  
CG:"No, I mean why me?"  
Erase:"You're the guest!"

CG:"**** YOU, YOU LITTLE ****,GO WALK YOUR ****ING **** POODLE AT YOUR ****ING COUNTRY!"  
Erase:"HEY YOU CAN INSULT ME BUT YOU DON'T INSULT MAH DOG **** SUCKER!"

CG:"Hey look, almost everyone is over!"  
Erase:"Really? Lemme see, Sanji, Nami, Robin, Zoro, Tashigi, Kalifa, Chopper, Vivi, Ace and Jamie are at the finish line, Brook, Alvida, Franky and Amber were eaten and Usopp, Kaia and Kaku are still racing."

After a while they got to the finish line.

Usopp and Kaya jumped into land.  
Usopp:"PHEW, I don't we weren't going to make it!"

Kaya:"Yeah. Wait,where's Kaku?"  
Very Happy Crocodile:"*Burp*!"

Everyone:"..."  
Erase:"...Okay...Everyone except Kalifa, Kaku, Amber, Brook, Franky and Alvida are going to the next round."

CG:"Well, It seems we ran out of time today."  
Erase:"But we will be back!"  
CG:"And don't forget to vote!"  
Erase:"Tomorrow's an elimination day and we're going to get rid of one boy and one girl so please vote! You can vote even if you already voted on another chapter!"  
CG:"Remember, without your votes there's no Reality Fic!"

Erase:"And without RF nobody would be here to torture OP characters!"

CG: "So remember VOTE and..."  
Erase & CG :"C-YA!"

_No crocodiles were hurt in the making of this the ones that were kicked or punched by a rubber man._


	4. Day 3

_Front Garden, 7:35 P.M._

Erase:"Good morning, kiddies! Did ya sleep well?"

Tashigi:"What's he doing here?"  
Cool Guy:"Hi."  
Erase:"We had so much fun yesterday, I decided to hire him as my co-host."  
CG:"Well, let's get this party started motherfuckers!"

Nami:"Nobody deserves this."

Erase:"Well, I guess it's time to introduce today's challenge."  
CG:"Today, you are going to lift two giant hamburgers connected by a metal pole."

Erase:"Only one person of the pair needs to lift. You must lift at least 100 pounds."  
CG:"The pair who lifts the most weight wins!"  
Erase:"Ta-da, easy as that!"

Usopp:"If the point is to lift weights, then couldn't we just lift regular barbels?"  
Erase:"But what's the fun in that?"  
Usopp:"Well, the challenge would still be hard, the reader could laugh and there would be no silliness."  
Erase:"No...Silly? No..."  
The girl stood there mouth open.

CG:"I think you broke her. Could we get some help here?"  
A guy with black and blue hair appeared.

Guy:"Commercial break!"

_Commercial Break:_

_(Catchy music starts. A guy wearing hockey equipment appears and drinks from a can saying "DARE". His outfit changes into soccer equipment. He scores a goal and drinks again, changing into basketball clothes. He slam dunks and drinks, changing into baseball outfit. He scores a home run and smiles at the camera.)_

_DARE to be a champion? Also available: DARE Lemon, DARE Diet and DARE Vanilla Soda!_

_-_

_(A huge field with cereal plants.)_

"_When I don't feel like eating..."  
(A hyper skinny girl appears.)_

"_I grab a box of Anorex-O's and pretend I'm actually eating food."  
(Grabs a box and pours some weird paper shreds looking stuff into a bowl.)_

"_Anorex-O's has zero calories, zero vitamins, zero everything."  
Best eaten with DARE Diet than with milk._

_End of commercial break._

CG:"Okay, we're kinda back. Erase's still feeling a bit, uh...So we're going to introduce today's special guest! His name is Robert, though you may call him Kenil!"

Kenil:"Hi."  
Robin:"No car this time?"  
Kenil:"Sorry, I arrived during the Anorex-O's commercial."  
CG:"Okay, meet us here at 5 PM sharp to begin the challenge!"  
Kenil:"Wait, what's the challenge?"  
CG"Shit, you don't know? I'll explain it to you later, right now just smile and wave at the readers."

Kenil and Cool Guy forced a smile and waved slightly.

_Kitchen 13:02 PM_

Everyone was having lunch.

Tashigi smiled to herself as she forked a potato. Jamie was, again, staring at Nami, who was, again, getting very pissed off.

Zoro:"You know, I'm going to win this thing."  
Sanji:"What?"  
Zoro:"Well, I am the strongest."  
Sanji:"Shut up, bastard swordsman."  
Zoro:"Well, I am."  
Jamie glared at them. Both of them gulped and looked away. She turned to stare at Nami again.

Nami:"PLEASE, just tell me what it is?"

Jamie:"Hmm?"  
Nami:"Why are you always staring at me?"  
Jamie:"N-nothing, I just..."  
She gulped.

Jamie:"Okay, sorry, I'll stop."  
She turned away, but took out a mirror and used it to look at Nami. The redhead got up, grabbed the mirror, smashed it on the girls head and walked away.

Jamie:"WELL, OW, YOU BITCH!"  
Tashigi smiled at her.

Tashigi:"Oh, she won't be so bitchy after today!"

Jamie:"Uh?"

Tashigi:"Me and Zoro are going to overwhelm this competition!"  
Jamie:"...Yeah, sure."  
She scratched her head and kept eating.

Front Garden, 5:03 PM

Erase:"Okay, I'm back!"  
Nami rolled her eyes.

Nami:"Hooray."  
Erase:"Shut up. Kenil, do the honors?"

Kenil:"Sure. Now, as you can see over there, the crew placed several burger-barbells of different sizes for you to lift. As said before the players who didn't pass the last challenge, Brooke and Amber, Kaku and Kalifa, Franky and Alvida won't be able to participate in this one. So, I guess it's time to start?"

CG:"Wait, where are the guys who were eaten by the crocodiles?"  
Erase:"Time to start! Let's go. First off:Sanji and Nami!"  
Sanji stepped forward.

Sanji:"I'm the one who's going to going to lift the weights."  
Erase:"Gee, big surprise."

CG:"Yes, because Nami is sooooo strong that this is totally unexpected."

Nami glared at the teenagers but said nothing.

Sanji effortlessly picked up the biggest burger-barbell.  
Erase:"Can someone bring us some more weights?"  
The crew quickly brought some more weights.

Sanji finally stopped at the sixth barbell.

Erase:"Can't lift more?"

Sanji:"I probably could but it's getting late."  
CG:"He's right you know."  
Erase:"Yeah, yeah. Usopp and Kaya?"  
Usopp stepped forward smiling widely.

Usopp:"Ah, why even bother. For your information I can lift over 1000000 pounds!"  
Erase:"Right, and the moon's made of cheese."  
Kenil:"Usopp, could you just do it?"  
Usopp:"Uh, okay."  
He chuckled slightly.

Usopp:"It's easy."

He headed for the smallest barbell.

Usopp:"Warm up."  
Everyone (Except Kaya):"Right."  
Usopp tried to lift the barbell, only to fall on his face.

Erase:"Epic fail."  
Kenil:"That was a bit pathetic."

CG:*Laughing too hard to make sentences*

Kaya:"Oh, Usopp, are you okay?"

Usopp:"Yeah, falling face first is nothing for the Great-Ow, I think I broke a tooth."  
Erase:"Just get back to the others."  
CG:"Next up, Luffy and Robin."  
Luffy stepped forward.

Luffy:"Yosh, I'm ready."  
Robin:"Wait a second, captain. May I try this one?"

Luffy:"Eh, Robin, but I wanna win!"  
Robin:"I can assure you I'm perfectly capable of lifting."  
Luffy:"But-"  
Robin stepped forward and crossed her arms in front of her chest.

Suddenly, lots of arms appeared and formed a huge arm.

CG:"Hey, that's cheating!"  
Erase:"No, it's perfectly inside the rules."

The arm lifted the biggest weight there effortlessly.  
Erase:"Can someone get bigger-"  
Robin:"There's no need, Host-san. I'll stop here."  
Erase:"Fine, have it your way. Chopper and Vivi?"  
Chopper meekly walked towards the weights and transformed into heavy point.

Chopper:"Okay, I'm going to try."  
He lifted the same weight Robin had and tried to lift it. When he almost had it in the air a butterfly landed on his nose.

Chopper:"GAH, GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF!"  
He dropped the weight and ran away.

Erase:"And that was a disqualification. Do you want to try, Vivi-chan?"

The blue haired girl shook her head slowly and silently.

Erase:"M'kay, Smoker, Hina?"  
Hina:"Hina will do it."  
Smoker:"What, no you won't!I want to do it!"  
Hina:"No, Hina will!"  
Smoker:"Me!"  
Hina:"Hina!"

Smoker:"ME!"

Hina:"HINA!"

Erase:"Okay, you're disqualified."  
Hina and Smoker:"What?!"  
Erase:"The time to chose the representative is up."  
Smoker:"There's a time limit?"  
Hina:"Hina is not happy."

Erase:"And now, Ace and Jamie."  
Ace cautiously stepped back as Jamie headed towards the barbells.  
She lifted the heaviest and smiled. And then...  
Jamie:"Ack, a snake!"

In panic, she threw the barbell (That landed on Ace) and ran away.

Erase:"I guess that's another disqualification."

Kenil:"And now Zoro and Tashigi."  
Zoro:"Fine, I'll win this stupid competition."  
Tashigi:"What, no, I will be the one who wins!"

CG:"Here we go."  
Erase:"Smoker and Hina all over again."  
Kenil:"Time's ticking."  
Zoro and Tashigi glared at them. They turned towards each other."  
Zoro:"I'll go, I'm psychically stronger and this isn't about swords, it's about pure brute force."  
Tashigi:"Fine, go."

Zoro lifted the weight with one hand.  
Erase:"Okay, I guess the winners are Zoro and Miss Lack-of-fashion-sense."  
Tashigi:"HEY!"

CG:"The losers are Smoker and Hina, Usopp and Kaya, Ace and Jamie, Chopper and Vivi."  
Kenil:"The only people left on the quadruple tournament are Sanji and Nami, Luffy and Robin, Zoro and Tashigi ."  
CG:"Wow."  
Erase:"Well, I guess you can go back to-WRONG! Today's an elimination day, bitches."  
She laughed maniacally..

CG:"Wanna do the honors, Kenil?"  
Kenil:"Sure. Now, the people's choice! The two people who are going to leave the house tonight are..."

Erase:"Drum roll please."  
The drum roll started.

Kenil took a deep breath.

Kenil:"Ace and Alvida!"

Alvida came out of the house looking desolated. Ace started dancing.

Ace:"YES, YES, YES! No more psycho bitch! Woohoo!"

Alvida:"My life...It has no meaning..."  
Erase:"Alrighty-oh! Get your asses off here."

A black Astra appeared and two security guards came out. They dragged them to the car, Alvida completely heartbroken and Ace still dancing.

Erase:"Okay, so now Jamie and Franky are together."

Jamie:"What, but Franky was eaten, what about the competition?"

Erase:"Don't worry, Alvida is fine and so is Franky and the others who were eaten, and we won't disqualify you. Well, that's it for today."  
CG:"Close the show Kenil."  
Kenil:"Fine. Dear reader, thank you for being here with us today. We would appreciate your votes because there is no Reality Fic without the readers. So you know how it goes, you write a review or a comment or an e-mail or whatever and say the name of the boy and girl you want out of here. Stay tuned for the next chapter!"


	5. Day 4

Front Garden, 7:32 AM

Erase:"Good morning-"  
Nami:"Yes, we know, good morning kiddies! Lets get this over with. "

Erase:"My, you're in a bad mood? "  
Sanji:"Where's Cool Guy? "  
Erase:"He went to pick up our new guest. Well, how are you guys? "

Zoro:"Are you kidding? We're the only ones that are awake at this time! "  
Erase:"Gee, sorry. Are you or are no not ready to wrestle some bears? "  
Sanji, Zoro, Luffy, Tashigi and Robin:"Yes. "  
Nami:"No. "

Erase:"Great! We'll start today at 15:00! You best be prepared to kick some furry ass! "

Kitchen, 10:07 AM

Tashigi:"Nami! "

The redhead sighed.

Nami:"What? "

Tashigi:"Just so you know, me and Zoro are totally going to rule this competition! "

Nami:"Fine. "

Tashigi:"We're stronger, we're faster, we are the greatest! Even if that moron is a moron, we have my intelligence so-"  
Nami quickly left the kitchen, leaving Tashigi talking to the walls.

Living Room, 10:09 AM

Jamie:"NAMI! "

The navigator glared at the girl.

Nami:"What? "

Jamie:"I was just thinking. . . Are you crazy? "

Nami:"No. "  
Jamie:"Are you sure? "  
Nami:"Yes. "

Jamie:"Absolutely? "

Nami:"Yes. "  
Jamie:"Reaaaaaaaaly? "

Nami:"Why don't you go piss off somebody else? "

Jamie:"I tried talking to Kalifa but she just wanted to know how you sue for sexual harassment. "

Nami:"Why am I not surprised? "

Jamie:"So are you crazy? "

Nami:"No! "

Front Garden, 3:12 PM

CG:"We're here! "

Erase:"Great! Everybody give a round of aplause to. . . Jaden! "

Jaden:"Hey! "  
Silence.  
Erase:"Not a single clap? "  
Tashigi:"Not likely. "  
Jaden:"Whatever. "  
Erase:"Well said. "  
CG:"Well, who's ready to wrestle? "  
Erase:"Not that that matters since you're all going to do it. "

Jaden:"If you look over there you'll see a wrestling ring and a cage full of bears. "  
The bears growled loudly. Nami took a cautious step back.

Erase:"As you can see, there are only 3 bears. "

Nami:"Wait, wait, wait. That means only a member of each team will fight with the bear. "  
Erase:"Actually, I was thinking tag teaming, but in your case that's what's likely going to happen. "

Jaden:"The rules are like this: You go in, kick the bears ass and then get out. You can switch with your partner at any time. Whoever takes the longest fails. The two teams who do win will participate in tomorrow's race. Does everyone get it? "  
The six of them nodded.

Erase:"Okay, let's start! Sanji and Nami! "

Nami:"Wait, why do we always start? "  
Erase shrugged and pointed at the ring. Sanji jumped on it and fixed his tie.

Sanji:"Bring it. "

The crew brought a bear into the ring. The bear growled loudly and pounced at Sanji. Who kicked it to the stratosphere.  
Erase:"And that was. . . 0, 006 seconds. "

CG:"Daaaaaaamn. "

Jaden:"Zoro and Tashigi. "

Zoro unleashed one of his swords.

Zoro:"Be right back. "  
He jumped into the ring as the bear was let in.  
Erase:"What's he-OH GOD, THE HORROR! "

CG:"What the hell is he doing to that poor bear? ! "  
Jaden:"I. . . I think it's dead. "  
Erase:". . . 0. 006 seconds. It's a t-tie. "

Zoro came back covered in blood.

Erase:"I guess Luffy and Robin are next. "  
Luffy jumped onto the ring. The bear was already there.

Luffy:"Whoa, Mr. Bear! "

The bear just stood there glaring at him.

Luffy:"Hey, it must be good to be a bear! I mean, you just sit around and eat honey and meat! Wow, I want to be a bear! Can I be a bear, can I can I? "

And he kept talking until the bear smacked him and went back to his cage, facepalming.

Erase:"And the bear quit the match. "  
Jaden:"Yet Luffy loses due to being too slow. "

CG:"I guess that's it. "  
Jaden:"Why did I have to be the guest in such a boring chapter? "  
Erase:"Shut up and go clean my room. "  
Jaden:"What, why would I-"

Erase:"Dooooo eeeeet! "

Jaden:"You know what? NO! I will not be just another guest star! "

He took out an M16 and pointed it at Nami.

Jaden:"Move and the girl dies! "

Erase:"Fine, do it and see if I care. "  
Jaden and Nami:"What? ! "

Erase:"Even if you kill her I'll still be the author and I'll still be able to undo anything you do! "

Jaden:"What, seriously? "  
Erase:"Uh-uh. "  
Jaden:"You mean it? "

Erase:"Oh yeah! "

Jaden:"So. . . If I burned the house down? "

Erase:"I'd fix it. "  
Jaden:"Destroy all life in the garden and then put salt on the earth. "  
Erase:"Fix it. "  
Jaden:"Stole everyone's clothes? "

Erase:". . . "

Jaden:"So? "  
Erase:"Wait, I'm thinking. . . Yeah, I'd fix it. But just so they wouldn't die of hypothermia. "

Jaden:"What if I pushed Luffy into a swimming pool? "  
Erase:"Fix it. "

Jaden:"Shaved Kalifa's head while she was asleep? "  
Erase:"I wouldn't fix it, for humorous effect. "

Jaden:"Oh, well, that makes sense. What if I dug up a hole in the middle of the living room? "  
Erase:"Fix it. "

CG:"Okay, I'm going to interrupt here. Well, it's the end of the show. Everybody, don't forgot to vote! "

Erase:"Yeah, and cheers to my mate Boneyboy, of the Boneyboy and Curleyblue duo! And also, Jaden's creator! "  
Jaden:"Cheers. "

CG:"Remember, if you don't vote Ezzy can't write the story! "  
Erase:"So if you like this story, please do review and vote! Well, see ya! "


	6. Day 5

_Stadium, 9:00 PM_

Erase cleared her throat and grabbed a microphone.

Erase:"Hello and good morning, I am here in the Reality Fic stadium, with my co-host, Cool Guy! "  
Cool Guy:"Good morning! Today is the last day of the, uh. . . "

Erase:"The quadrathlon! "

CG:"Is that even a word? "

Erase:"Hell if I know. Today, the Sanji/Nami team will face the Zoro/Tashigi team in a match of speed! "  
CG:"They'll run a 400 meter race! "  
Erase:"While being chased by rabid rabbits! "

Erase & CG:"*Evil laughter*"

At the track, Sanji and Zoro glared at each other.

Zoro:"Don't let the bunnies eat you. "  
Sanji:"Yeah, by the time you realize the race started, I already won. "

Tashigi smiled cockily at Nami.

Tashigi:"Nami. "  
Nami:". . . Uh, Tashigi. "

Tashigi:"Let the best team win. "  
Nami:"Right. . . "

At the commentators booth, Erase and Cool Guy began the report.

Erase:"Joining us today as our guest, is our friend, Mr. Drake Vindu. "

Vindu:"Hey there. "  
Cool Guy:"So, what is your thoughts on today's race? "

Vindu:"Well, this has all the requirements to be a great race! Clear skies, nice temperature and some really rabid rabbits! "

Erase:"Alright, I'll explain the rules. The first one to arrive at the finish line wins. Try not to get chewed by the rabbits. "

At the stands, the rest of the guys we're watching and cheering.

Luffy:"GO ZORO! GO SANJI! "

Robin:"You are aware they are racing against each other, right? "  
Luffy:". . . Eh? "

Robin:"You know what, never mind. "

Back at the commentators booth, Erase smirked maliciously.

Erase:"And the race starts! RELASE THE RABITS! !

At the track, the cage was opened. Dozens of oversized rabbits with foaming mouths came running towards them.

Nami:"What about "Ready, set, go! "? "

Sanji:"Screw "Ready, set, go! "! Just run! "

The four started running. Very soon, a rabbit had caught Zoro.

Zoro:"WHAT THE-"

He tried to shake it off to no avail.

Zoro:"Well, FUCK IT! "

He restarted running, with the confused rabbit on his back. Unfortunately, three other rabbits jumped on him.

Soon after, Tashigi was caught too. The rest of the rabbits were running after Nami and Sanji.  
Sanji:"Nami-san, watch out! "

He kicked the rabbit that came too close to her away, but the others caught him. Nami kept running. She was about to reach the finish line when. . .

Zoro:"Like hell you will! "

He grabbed the rabit covered Tashigi. With a powerful swing, he sent her flying at top speed. Surprising everyone, Tashigi was the one crossing the line first.

Vindu:"Okay, it's over! Catch the damn rabbits! "

CG:"Wow, look at those cute, fluffy, killing machines. "

Erase:"So I guess the winners are Zoro and Tash? "

Vindu:"Well, I checked the rulebook. There's nothing there saying the players can't fly across the finish line. "

Erase turned on the mic.

Erase:"And the winners of the quadrathlon are Roronoa Zoro and Tashigi! Congrats! "

Vindu pulled out a giant needle.

Vindu:"Time for your rabies shots! "

Mysterious Room, 8:09 PM

Nami:"Can someone please explain what the hell we are doing here? "

Erase:"I can. "  
Nami:"Someone with a fully functional brain, please? "

Vindu:"Well, you see, this is the Meeting Room. Every five days you guys, the hosts and the guest of the day will, well, meet here to discuss important matters and happenings in the house. "

Luffy:"Ahh. . . So it's a mystery room? "

Vindu:". . . Yes, Luffy, that's exactly it.

Zoro:"But why is there a glass wall separating us and you guys? "

Erase:"So we don't get lynched. Well, let's start. "

CG:"Oh, oh, me first! How did Ace and Alvida's expulsion affect you guys. "

Silence.

Robin:"It didn't really affect anyone. "  
Jamie:"Well, I kinda wanted to beat him up a bit more. "

Erase:"So Nami, what do you feel, knowing that Jamie thinks you're a nutcase? "

Nami:"WHAT! ? "

Jamie:"Oh fuck. "

Erase:"You. . . Didn't know? Well, fuck indeed! "

The redhead got up from her chair and glared at the blond.

Jamie:"H-hey, Nami, I was pondering you know. I mean, remember that first day, when you were acting all weird?  
Nami:"That was because Robin and Kalifa were almost screwing in the couch! "

Erase:"Wait, pause and rewind, Robin and Kalifa were what? "  
CG:"_You_ didn't know? "

Vindu:"You know, it's very serious when the writer doesn't even know what's going on. "  
Erase:"Shut up. I have other things to worry about. Can you believe I have to do a Power point presentation for Philosophy class about Ze-something? "

Vindu:"You mean Zeno, the pre-Socratic? "

Erase:"Yeah, something like that. "

CG:"Okay, that's enough. I'm sure you wanted to torture the participants some more, but we have a show to run. So, could you please close? "

Erase:"Fine. Well, that's it for today folks! Vindy, do the honors? "

Vindu:"Sure. Don't forget to review and vote! If you don't vote Ezzy can't write. "  
Erase:"That's right, I can't. And next chapter's an elimination day, and I still don't know who's out."

CG:"You know the drill, vote for a boy and a girl! "

Erase:"Well, cya! "


End file.
